I have experienced this in almost every phase of my life. Are you aware of that feeling when you expect something from people, but in return, they hardly do anything? It's not that you expect them to give you expensive gifts, but a small recognition. A small piece of appreciation. A small piece of acknowledgement.

All my life I've experienced this. People always disappoint me and I end up thinking if I am vulnerable. I have realized that it's not my vulnerability--I'm not sensitive and a hopeless emotional person. I just waste my love and my energy and all that I have on wrong people. They are undeniably important, but you know who are those people worth shedding tears for? Those people worth chasing? Those people worth every emotion? And those that are supposed to be loved by you?

Those people who would do all this for you. Remember that one friend who is overly attached to you? The one who has cried for you and the one who wonders what wrong she does that you don't love her back the way she loves you? That's exactly the one worth giving everything. 

Throughout my life I have been caring about wrong people. I remember one incident in my third year of graduation, I had cried when one of my friends (whom I shouldn't call a friend by the definition of it) said she was not coming for the annual college trip. What was I thinking? Why would I cry for her? I know that it was a collective outburst of disappointment that none of my friends were coming to the trip, but why would I cry when particularly she said no?
(Trust me, she was a newcomer I barely knew. She was not a friend, just a dear classmate you can say.) If I can cry for her, imagine what all I should do for those that cry for me?

I am purely not loving them enough. I should shout from a hilltop saying how much I love these people. I should constantly make them happy; I should do all those things that they do for me.

I have few precious ones whom I'm aiming to improve my relationship with. These are the ones that would do anything for me and love me so dearly, that it's painful.

I hope I flourish the relationship I share with them. I wanna give them so much. So very much.

xoxo